Friday, December 02, 2011

Secret agent wife

Back in France, ah France, I used to insert lots of descriptive setting info into my posts: The sun is melting, golden and syrupy, into the distant hillside, the leaves are dancing, like twirling acrobats, on the balmy breeze, the air smells of Pixie Stix. Remember that? I don’t either.

 Life is in overdrive today. I'm leaving for Guatemala tomorrow for my Save the Children trip. I would be totally excited if I could see past my nose, or past the huge pile of recycling I need to take to Fort Dumpster before I leave. Loose ends.

I'm in the weeds. And the way I can tell is because I can’t seem to find the time to

A: Even acknowledge the weather or my surroundings,

and B: I no longer write down all the profound things my kids say to me. I hear, practically see, these gems fall out of their mouths, I register that little heart squeeze that happens to all moms who get such surges of love, mixed with pride, mixed with the sadness that these children are not really ours to keep, and the moment passes. And I’m back to figuring out my  health care premium, and working out an installment plan for paying our 2010 taxes, and reading, with crossed eyes, the 4-page PDF document, written in incomprehensible govermentese, sent from the National Visa Center, regarding the status of my alien husband, Ian, who is still not allowed to come back to the United States even for a visit.

They want me to register an agent for him, and pay them some more money, and fill out another half dozen forms, and secure him a financial sponsor, before they will consider giving him back. I am now, officially my husband’s agent, not just his wife.

Ah bureaucracy. It's getting stale. It's starting to stink.

And C:  I know I'm in the weeds when  I forget to take pictures.

I will, however, be taking as many pictures as I can get away with in Guatemala. They are sure to be colorful and rich with grainy humanity.


BrandyH said...

I just have to say that this obstacle our Government is putting you through regarding Ian is just pure bullshit! No other way to say it.

Anyway, hope you have a very nice and safe trip!

Sheri said...

I cannot believe you are still dealing with that crap! I really hope you can get it all figured out. I sooo feel for you and your girls.

I hope you enjoy your trip, take it all in. I can't wait to hear all about it!
Even without pics and fancy words, you still always manage to make me smile and feel so happy to be a mommy.
Safe travels!

Anonymous said...

Time away is just what you need to see past your nose.


Anonymous said...

LOVE this. Have a wonderful trip. Can't wait to read the details.

Keep talking, we're listening.


Betsy said...

I've got kind of a long nose, hopefully five days will do it.

Katriina said...

Wishing you a successful and highly fulfilling trip! Here's hoping that you will come back to find that the red tape has magically unravelled, allowing you to have your husband back again.

Anonymous said...

Thinking of you right now Monday morning East Coast time, Betsy! Soak up every moment! Safe travels! woo hoo, you go girl, what a great adventure! And you are showing your daughters, through example, not words, that mothers can be mothers as well as strong independent women! And showing your daughters that they can be cared for and safe and loved and calm, even when Mom is away!

Anonymous said...

Hi Betsy, I'm reporter researching a story about Skype and noticed your postings on the subject. I would love to interview you for my piece. Is there an email or phone where I can reach you? I can be reached at Many thanks in advance for getting in touch. Regards, Julie Scelfo

Marie Makulilo said...

My husband is from Tanzania. He came to the US on a Fulbright Scholarship (requires him to return to his home country for at least 2 years). Following the Fulbright year, he got a MA scholarship in CA. We met, married and are dealing with the stupid stuff you write about, as well. We have our Green Card appt. soon. It was tough finding a sponsor, as neither of us have that type of money. Thank God nothing is impossible for Him (God). I hope you all will be reunited for good in the US very soon.